Last night threw blue suede shoe out front door.
Pulled rug from under big black bug,
Nailed it flailing to the laminated floor.
Swatted one fat fly with my Freddie Flintoff cricket bat.
After that, set fire to coconut matting in porch,
Went up like a torch
Along with linseed oil, bails and stumps.
Jerked phone off wall, left huge hole,
Plaster in lumps.
Wiped ass on Madras brown drapes,
Pissed all over living room floor
Swam through the lake.
Left fake message for the wife,
Macdonald vouchered my kids for life.
Ran out through rhododendron bushes and hid
Blasted passing motorist through his midriff.
Drove straight over top of nearest cliff.
Lifted by some mysterious cyber force.
Landed in the gorse bush at bottom of rock garden.
Sneaked back inside placed luminous socks inside my money box
Collapsed on leatherette settee, started to snore.
Worm crawled back inside rotting apple core.
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I so know this feeling, this was actually reassuring! This was really cool. Ta.
ReplyDeleteHi Anon
ReplyDeleteJust washed my luminous socks and now my feet can see in the dark
Max Elvis Shallow